Following my gut instinct, I moved to NYC from Tokyo in my late 20^s. My gut instinct guided me to seek out who I truly am. It was a tiny needlepoint light in the dark and a long tunnel strong enough to attract me. Looking back, I realized how I could pursue and thrive to know who I truly am because of my desire to complete the incomplete.

After I worked with clients with Autism, I realized that I also have Autism. In the beginning, it was just a doubt. But, I started to observe myself much more closely and precisely.

I noticed several holes in me, like Swiss cheese. Some holes were large, and some were small. Some of them were deep, and some were shallow. All holes were filled with energy unfamiliar to my senses and experiences. Those unknown energies created some fog. The fog interfered with my sense of wholeness. I knew solidly that those holes filled with unfamiliarity were scattered. When the fog became thicker, I lost the sense of who I thought I was. Once, I was stuck in a hole and had trouble organizing who I thought I was.

Nevertheless, the cases of my clients with Autism were much more problematic than mine. So, they encountered more complicated challenges in communicating with others and themselves.

However, the discovery of my autism helped me to be able to understand and connect with my clients with Autism because we shared similar challenges.

Many of us believe that we are okay until it becomes undeniable that we are not. In reality, all of us are not okay, which means all of us are okay. Understanding this concept opened my vision to be able to figure out the cause of why some people with Autism do not like to be touched or be closer to, even their parents in some cases. Please read How to Communicate with Your Child with Autism.

Today, I believe that Autism is a message from Mother Nature. Emerging from Autism is a road back to Nature, which we all must learn. This is a way to bring back the good humanity.

The father of a client with Autism once told me, “We are strong enough to solve the problem; that’s why we are given the challenge. Whatever it is, we must learn from our autistic child.”

My clients’ energy resonated with my story of Swiss Cheese Holes, especially those diagnosed with Autism. Interestingly, once I realized and accepted who I was, their energy made me feel comfortable, vibrating and loosening me up. It was a fantastic experience, after all. Every time I revealed a hole and discovered something new in myself, I felt excited and relieved. Then, I gained a sense of peace and happiness. Every unknown hole flipped to known, just like in the Othero game.  Flipping one side to the other satisfies you with an inner flash of little light. I sensed that my self-esteem became firm as I allowed myself to walk into a more profound adventure. As I gained the knowledge and acceptance of who I am, my fear and anxiety dissipated gradually and significantly.